I called Jan for an interview when we heard at the paper that she was going to be on the Oprah show with Shannon's gratitude bookmarks. My timing was horrible. She and Jules had gone that day to spread some of Shannon's ashes. When I went to her house a few days later, she couldn't have been more kind. We talked about Shannon, and though I never met Jan and Jules' wonderful daughter, I knew instantly I would have liked her. Jan took me up to Shannon's room, which remains unchanged, and for one of the few times in my career as a journalist, I cried. I was embarassed at first, but Jan made me feel so safe. Writing a story like that, about someone who's gone to heaven, is one of the scariest things to do--you never feel you can do justice to this person who is loved so much.

Jan and Shannon have been with me every minute since then--when Molly got cancer, and then my Mom did too; when things were scary at work; when it got too cold last winter and we nearly froze our fish to death, and Jan rescued them and then they had baby fishies!

I knew I had to call Jan the day of my accident. I didn't think about how it might effect her--hearing news (again) of someone she loved being hurt in an accident--I just knew that I needed Shannon more than ever. Jan and my mother share the same birthday, Dec. 26. Jan has been like a mom to me--showing unconditional love and support. I am so grateful to Shannon for allowing our paths to cross. Jan, Jules and Shannon have taught me so much--about love, loss, and courage.

Likewise, my parents have shown me unconditional love and support. When I disappointed them, they helped me become a better person. When I hurt them, they found a way to heal and they held me close, no matter how hard I tried to push away. And this year, when I was broken, they took care of me, like the helpless baby I once was, and the relatively helpless adult I was for some time. They stood beside me when I could not stand, wept with me when I wept, and rejoiced with me over every triumph. Nothing I could do or say could express to them how much I love them and how grateful I am to be their daughter. I am passing my heart on to them.